Best year of my life!

One down, many more to go! Today, Mark and I have been married 1 year. Yes, only 1 year. We had planned on waiting 3 years to have children and, well, we waited 3 months. Nevertheless, we have a beautiful baby girl and wouldn't do a thing different.

Last night, my best friend, Brianna (Onny) kept Emma for us and Mark and I went and had dinner at Texas Land & Cattle. One of our first dates was on the Riverwalk on Valentine's Day and that is where we ate. After dinner, we went to the movies and saw Love Happens (which I highly recommend). It was a really nice evening to get out of the house and get to have a night with just the two of us to celebrate!

Today I sat in church and reflected on the last year with Mark. We have done so many things in that short time. We started our marriage by coming home from our honeymoon and got extremely sick for 2 weeks with a Mexico stomach bug and let me just tell you how romantic that was to experience together. :) Three months after our wedding, we learned we were pregnant. Two months after that, I moved to Lubbock to begin working to start saving PTO for maternity leave. Mark completed the hiring process with Lubbock Fire Dept and in fact, is on his first shift right now for the City of Lubbock. SO, in a short year, we got pregnant, both changed jobs, moved cities, lived in 3 different houses, and had a beautiful daughter.

Here are just a few reasons that I fell in love with Mark and reasons why I love him more and more each day!...
- He loves God, his family, his friends.
- He is almost always happy!
- He would give anyone the shirt off his back.
- When there is something he doesn't really want to do but he knows it is something important to me, he does it without ever complaining!
- He looks at me and just smiles and says, "You're so pretty!"
- When he does something to make me mad, he just lets me fume for awhile and then says something really funny and I've calmed down by then and can just laugh.
- He is the BEST daddy to Emma Grace!
- He loves my family just as I do.
- His family has taken me in as their own!
- He is affectionate in public and at home!
- He kisses me every night and every single morning!
- He fills my car up with gas because he knows it's my least favorite thing to do.
- He randomly gets me flowers, sometimes for no reason at all!
And finally
- He is Mark Darrel, and there is NOTHING I don't love about him! He is a great husband, my husband. When I picture our next year and another 20 after that, I picture him by my side through every good moment and every bad one as well.

I looked up our wedding vows that we personally wrote to each other on our wedding day and I read them and cried tears of joy. I believe these to be true now even more than the day we said them to each other! I will share...
Mark's vows to me:
"I Mark, take you, Kara Marie, to be my wife, my other half. I promise to be your best friend. To always be there for you, through all the laughter and happiness, as well as the hard times. I promise to always support, encourage, and push you to attain your goals and dreams. I promise to do everything I can to make you happy, even if that means buying you a new pair of shoes every now and then. I promise to listen to you even when you might think I am incapable of doing so at times. And when the time comes, I promise to be the best father that I can be and to always do everything in my power to better our family. I promise that the first and last thing I do each day is hold and kiss you. I pledge to always be faithful, and to never leave your side. I've never met anyone like you Kara. You have all the qualities I've ever wanted in someone. I love you, and I vow to never stop loving you for the rest of my life."
My vows to Mark:
" I, Kara, choose you Mark as my best friend, my love for life. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tenderest care, through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future. I promise to be faithful to you. I promise to love you, to commit to you, to support you. I pledge to respect your unique talents and abilities, to lend you strength for all your dreams. You have shown me what love feels like and for that I thank you. You are everything I need and at this moment I know all of my prayers have been answered and all my dreams have come true. I praise God for you Mark. For all your love and constant friendship. I know that our love is heaven sent and I promise to be here forever and always. From this day forward, you shall not walk alone. My heart will be your shelter and my arms will be your home. As I have given you my hand to hold, I give you my heart to keep."

I LOVE YOU MARK D!!!!!!!

Six sweet weeks

Today Emma is 6 weeks old! I just cannot even believe it has been that long. She is changing every single day and we are having so much fun watching her change and seeing how her personality is developing. She is sweet like her daddy and stubborn like her momma! :) She talks to us by cooing, she grunts and only cries when she is hungry, and she is especially dramatic when her daddy is around. If she isn't being held, she loves to be propped up in her boppy. She does NOT like her swing or bouncer yet but we try it every few days to see if she might change her mind. I remind you, she is stubborn. She's a messy eater and after many grueling tests, we have learned that her lack of pooping may just be normal for her. I never knew going days and days without pooping for a newborn could be normal but they don't seem to find anything wrong after her colonoscopy and abdominal xray. The barium swallow did show reflux which we are treating with medicine twice a day. She misses her MeMe and Pops and loves for her Grandma and Grandpa to sing to her. She eats about 3 ounces every 3 hours except during the night, she wakes up every 4 to 5 hours to eat, which is a blessing. Bella is getting attached to her and is quiet protective of her. Emma holds her head up for 30-40 seconds and looks around...yes, at 6 weeks. She pushes with her legs while on her back and can

scoot a lot of places and scoot out of her carseat if she isn't buckled in. Did I mention she is stubborn and if she wants out, she gets herself out?? LOL! She IS her mother's daughter I say! She has smiled once at her daddy but hasn't anymore and we are waiting to get that big, gummy smile. We are having a blast with her and just can't seem to get enough of her! Everything she does is precious and every day she does something new. We love you, Emma Grace!

Centennial Class

These aren't the best pictures because my camera was acting up but we gave it a shot! Friday, September 25th, was Mark's graduation from the Lubbock Fire Department's recruit academy. It was a 5 week "crash" course to prepare them to go on shift for LFD. There was 27 recruits, 26 men and 1 woman. Mark will be stationed at Station 6, which is on 35th & Indiana, and is on C shift. There will be lots of changes for him and myself from the way things were done in Kerrville. For example, the shifts here are from 6pm to 6pm, where in Kerrville they were 8am to 8am. This graduating class is named the Centennial class because LFD is celebrating 100 years of service this year. As Mark walked in in line, following the bagpipe and bass drum playing, my heart swelled with pride. I am so proud of Mark for everything he has accomplished and for choosing a career where he can serve and help people. A common theme spoken in everyone's speech at graduation was God and how important it is to keep Him center of your life. At the end, I was honored to go on stage and pin Mark's badge on him. I pray that as he begins his journey here, he and our family will be blessed. We do not know what life brings us, but I pray for thankfulness in good times, perserverence in bad times, and faithfulness in both!

Showered with love & blessings

On Sunday, September 20th, the ladies from church in Clovis, once again blessed our lives! They had a baby shower for sweet Emma and I was blown away with everyone's support...not suprised, but grateful! I wasn't suprised at the support because my entire life this group of people have been there for me, during the best and worst times. We were given so many wonderful gifts, from clothes that will last us the first year if not longer, to lots of daiper, to a pack n' play to keep at my Mom and Dad's house, to the movement monitor I've been wanting to get since we brought her home. I have so many to thank and I will be spending this week finishing those thank you notes to mail off. However, a few to mention...Julie for hosting this shower in her beautiful home and doing so much on such short notice. All the ladies who made and prepared food for the occasion. To Aleta for the AMAZING cake that not only looked great but tasted wonderful as well. In fact, I've been inspired to attempt to take up fondant cake decorating. We'll see! To everyone who came and showered us with love. I am so incredibly lucky to have all of you and I cannot wait for Emma to grow up to know you all! She'll never know any better people! Thank you!

The end of a bad day...

It is 1:40 AM and I can't seem to clear my mind enough to go to bed. Emma has had 3 really bad nights, tonight included, and I just laid her down to sleep after 4 solid hours of screaming and crying. She acts like she's starved half to death but she is eating 3 ounces every hour at times right now just to keep her satisfied. She won't eat more than 3 ounces at a feeding but in an hour, she is rooting, sucking on anything she can get in her mouth, and crying her "hungry cry". She just doesn't seem comfortable lately. So, I am going to sit down and catch up on my blog because in a short 40 minutes, I'm sure she will be screaming again. No sense in going to bed for 30 minutes of sleep. I'm afraid Mark is going to have to pull some all nighters with her this weekend so I can sleep for a few hours straight. During the week, he sleeps all night because he works all day. On the weekends, he takes one feeding and I take one. This weekend, he might have to take them both so I can get some sort of rest.

With all the exhaustion, the events of today did not help my mind to rest any...nor my heart! Right after lunch, I got a text from Mom saying that she had taken Winnie (our boxer) to the vet and they had put her down. In July, the vet diagnosed Winnie with lymphoma but said until she was in pain or having a hard time, she was okay. Winnie wasn't just ANY dog. She was one of my best friends. In fact, I have a picture frame that says Best Buddies and the picture is of me sitting in the floor with her laying next to me with her paw on my leg and her looking me in the eye. That picture isn't special just because it's of us but more so because of the timing of when it was taken. It was taken during a hard time in my life and my families life. As a senior in high school, I was diagnosed with a neuromuscular disorder called Myasthenia Gravis. I wanted a dog so bad and so my parents suprised me one day with a boxer puppy...Winnie! My brother named her after Winchester rifles (I know, I know!) and she started her life with us. In our family, a dog is a member of the family just as everyone else. We have always had a dog and they always had the best life we could give them. Sometimes better than we ourselves had...;) So, there I was, with a dog I loved but also very sick. I had a serious surgery that was risky and came home much more sick than I ever had been. That summer after my senior year, it was touch and go and there were times when I couldn't do much for myself. I couldn't purse my lips around a straw or even a fork, couldn't raise my hands to wash my hair, couldn't even stand out of a car on some days. I endured lots of medications and treatment and was determined to not let this disease stop or hinder my life plans. As hard as that time was, I had a special friend with me through it all. Of course, my parents were by my side through everything and I couldn't have survived without their help and love but I had a friend who never left my side. That was Winnie. She was my buddy. She would just lay with me or put her front paws up on the couch where I was sitting and put her head behind my back and just be there touching me...telling me she wished I would get better. I went off to college and every time I came home, she was there, wagging her tail, jumping up and down, so excited to see me. During the time when I was sick, Winnie also made another close friend....my Dad. We have often said that Dad wouldn't had made it watching me be so sick and helpless had he not had Winnie to detour his energy to. They would spend hours in the backyard and if you listened, you would often hear him talking to her, just as if she was a human. Later in her life, Dad started taking her to McDonalds every Saturday morning and he would order a sausage biscuit with 2 patties....one for him and well, one for Winnie! She loved Mom too and although Mom used to say Winnie wouldn't let her love on her, there have been many times I've seen Winnie sit right next to Mom's recliner so Mom could pet her soft head and tell her how pretty she was. So now, Winnie is no longer here, no longer sufferring. And though that should give me peace, I can't be comforted just yet. I wish I had been there to tell her bye, to tell her how she made a extremely hard period in my life bearable, to tell her I simply love her! I sit here in tears and wonder if she knew how much she meant to us. Did we show her enough? It seems so funny to have all of these feeling about a dog! It's a dog that can't speak words out of their mouth but can love us unconditionally. I work around death every day in my job but nothing makes this any easier. She will be missed dearly and I will go home Sunday for the first time without my Winnie Moo being there to greet me at the door with her tail wagging, licking me to death, wiggling out of her skin...and I will be sad! Very sad!

As if I hadn't cried enough and been sad enough, poor Mom called again with more bad news. My granddads daughter, my step aunt, was found dead today in her home in Dallas. The cause is unclear and an autopsy is being performed now but regardless of the cause, it is sad and our hearts hurt. She had had a hard life but she was loved in the midst. My granddad is sad and that makes it that much harder. He is tearful and upset understandably. What do you say to comfort a parent on the loss of their child? As a parent now, I clearly ache for him knowing I would lay down and die if I lost Emma! Tomorrow we will know more after the autopsy results are in but I'm not sure it will give any ease to any of us. I pray my granddad can get some sleep tonight and Nana can stay calm enough to not get so frazzled until she can't breath, think, or function. I pray Debra is no longer hurting whether it be physically, mentally, or emotionally. We remember the good times we had!

And so there it is! We went to church tonight and I just sat and cried. I'm emotional enough being post-prego and I wouldn't have thought Winnie dying would have affected me so, but it devastated me and to top it off with Debra made it all so much worse. Hopefully tomorrow will be better...and every day after that will be easier as we miss the two we lost.

Kara

P.S. Good timing...Emma is screaming as we speak. A long night, this will be!

At the top is a picture of Winnie and Cash (our sweet boxer we lost a few years ago!)...Winnie is the one in the back!

4 weeks & tailgating

Emma is now 4 1/2 weeks old. I doesn't seem possible that it has been 4 1/2 weeks since she came into this world. This week was also Emma's original due date of Sept 12th! She was exactly 4 weeks early. I can't imagine being pregnant up until this week and miserable probably wouldn't come close to describe how I would be feeling.

I love watching her as she grows and develops her little personality. We already see some stubbornness shining through and I have no idea where she would have possibly gotten that from!! (wink, wink!) She is starting to focus a little better and is smiling in her sleep but not while she is awake yet. She is SO dramatic with her little hands and Mark thinks the cutest thing she does is when she sneezes and then makes a little whimper/sigh at the end....almost as if saying "Oh goodness, that was traumatic!". She is waking up about every 3 to 4 hours at night to eat and goes right back to sleep. Some nights...like the last 3...she has cried for much of the night. I think she is having tummy trouble so if it goes much longer, we will be going to the doctor I suppose. I don't want to be one of those "over obsessed" mothers but I don't want her uncomfortable or hurting either. She is definitely gaining weight and was at 6 lb 2 ounces last Wednesday! She is just a joy to have and Mark and I cannot get over how incredibly proud we are of her!

First family trip & 3 weeks old

This last was Labor Day weekend and Mark had Monday off so we decided this was a good time to take Emma to Kerrville to see Mark's grandparents. I was really nervous about taking a 3 week old baby on a 5 hour trip but she did amazing!

We left Friday at 7:30 and she woke up at 10:00 to eat so we stopped in Ballinger and fed her. She fell right back to sleep and at 12:30, we arrived in Kerrville in time for her to eat at 1:00 AM. I couldn't believe how well she did. I did learn how much is involved with travelling with a baby however. We decided to take Mark's truck for more room and we sure are glad we did. We had that back seat completely packed full with diaper bags, feeding things, suitcases, boppy, pack 'n plays, etc. It took me all week to make sure we were all ready to leave on Friday and I still worried the whole way there that I had forgotten something. Luckily, I didn't forget a thing and we had everything we needed.

We spent Saturday hanging out with Mark's grandparents, went to the fire station and saw some of Mark's friends/co-workers, saw Jenni, and that night went and spent some time with Larry & Kenda. Saturday Emma turned 3 weeks old and we cannot believe how fast time has gone already. She has changed so much in this short time and we can't picture life without her. The joy she brings to our lives is immeasurable.

Sunday we went to church, took a nap that afternoon, and then went to San Antonio with Pinky that evening and ate at Sushi Zushi! We stuffed our faces with sushi and enjoyed being with Pinky and laughing a lot!

Monday, I took Emma to my old job and showed her off to everyone. We then started the task of packing up and we hit the road home. It was so nice to go and see everyone and especially spend time with Memaw and Pawpaw but it sure was nice to be back home in our own surroundings! I'm not sure what's more work, packing or unpacking. ;)

Today we are back to normalcy! Mark went to work early this morning and Emma and I ran some errands and now she is sleeping soundly. I look at her and just smile. I never get tired of just staring at her! And my favorite part of the day is when Mark comes home and he holds her and talks to her and she just stares at him! She is a daddy's girl for sure and he is smitten! I love to watch them!

2 weeks old!

Emma is 2 weeks old already and I can't help but get her newborn pictures taken! She's too sweet and cute not to! They change so much in the first year and I don't want to ever forget any part of it! We took her to the doctor again and she is almost back to her birth weight. She weighs 5.3 and has grown to 19 inches now. She is such a good baby and although I talk about sleepless nights, I know those are normal and I can't complain about her! Mark and I look at her and wonder how we ever deserved such an amazing thing! Brianna (my best friend) went with Emma and I to get her pictures taken and it sure was a lot of help. Emma got pretty cranky after they got her naked and made her cold. I was cold in there and I was fulling clothed. Poor baby! She did great other up until then though! Here they are and I hope you enjoy as much as we are!